Creative Writing: Response to a novel

The following is a redraft of a scene from a Goosebumps story written for a young audience. The challenge for students to rewrite short excerpts of scenes from stories they are reading (and enjoying!) allows them to match their writing skills to a high standard, to engage with generic elements, and also to realise the structure and contents of successful short story composition.


    In the cold light of the girl’s locker room it was quiet. Very quiet. Here and there a lost, forgotten sock littered the gray cement floor. A smelly wet towel lay dumped in a corner. A spider crouched in its web around the buzzing end of a fluorescent light tube. The lockers stood tall at attention in waiting ranks. It was as quiet as a grave.

    Until the door to the girls locker room opened a crack, and light crept in through the tiny gap.

    “Anyone in here?” called a small voice. No answer.

    The door opened further, and then a monstrously large foot,
    cautiously followed by a monstrously huge leg stepped forward onto the concrete. The creature that followed was the colour of shivering pink flesh, with two great hands and a heaving, dripping wet body. It was HUGE! It might have been human. It was NAKED!

    With frightened steps the beast stomped towards the sinks and mirrors along the back wall. With a massive paw it reached forward and punched the button on the hair dryer, nearly crushing the metal box with the force of its animal desperation. The hair dryer roared to life, and the trembling monster reached forward to rub itself and dry itself under the hot blast of air.

    The huge monster didn’t seem so scary as first impressions might suggest. Indeed, the monster itself was very scared.

    It’s eyes were wide with fright as it worked at the hair dryer, struggling to rid itself of the sheen of water that covered its body. It twisted and turned, trying to get the air to blow upon the areas of its back, but it was far too large to fit itself in the space between the floor and beneath the hot jet. It banged noisily against the nozzle, struggling to become dry.

    “It HAS to work!” it screamed at the mirror.

    Yet whatever it saw looking back in its reflection gave the monster no satisfaction. What it saw was a frightened, cold, wet, ENORMOUS twelve year old boy.

    Just then there was a noise from the locker room door as it squeaked open. Girls voices intruded on the privacy of the naked giant boy.

    “Oh no!” he gasped. For there was nowhere to hide…

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